We’ve had a lot of people ask us what our new normals are now that we live in New York City. Our friends outside the city are asking— Is it really as colorful and fun as your Instagram makes it look? How are you adjusting to the faster pace? Do you take taxi’s everywhere you go? 

From our discussions with New Yorkers, the jump from the desert in Texas to the New York City seems extreme and potentially very culturally challenging— they look deep in our eyes searching for culture shock. But something I appreciate about both myself and my husband, is our one shared strength: adaptability. Our packaging reads, “apt to adjust quickly in most environments”. 

Personally, this is my fourth move to a new city in the last ten years. My first move I had such high expectations of what it would be like, I was devastated when nothing turned out the way I wanted it to. I know now, to be more realistic than I’m programmed to be. I’ve learned it’s best to keep all expectations low, stay adaptable to new cultural and social situations, and to move toward people no matter what.

That said, we’re still getting used to some new normals. Some new normals we LOVE. Some, we’re still figuring out. Some practical, social, ridiculous, and communal.

We’ve actually been keeping a list of cultural shifts and new normals on our phones, so you’re really getting the real deal with this list: 

1. Our heater sounds like those wraiths from Lord of the Rings. Buddy the Elf was afraid of the radiator and I get it now— it makes some scary noises. Our house is always warmer than any of apartment or home we lived in in Lubbock, so I don’t mind the noises. Keep the warmth coming, please.

2. Living without a car has been freeing and challenging. We’re intentional to consider what we have to bring on any given trip through the city, because whatever we bring, we carry. We can’t just keep it in the back of our car “just in case”. We actually spend more on transportation now than when we lived in Texas. A trip down to Trader Joes for both of us costs about $12. Grocery store trips used to cost us $1-$2 of gas. So, we’re still adjusting to making the most of every trip we make and batching our errands depending on what part of the city we’re in. We’re not uber or taxi takers, so we’re still learning the subway and getting some good steps in. I’m not complaining about all the walking I’ve added to my daily life. I understand now why it’s easier to be friends with people in your neighborhood. It’s an hour ride to Brooklyn to visit my brother and my sister-in-law, so we know when we see them, we’re committing to a two hour commute. It reminds me a lot of taking a visit from Fort Worth to Dallas.

3. Summer Time Habit: Washing my feet when I get home if I wore sandals out and about. Do you live in a city? Do you wear sandals? Do you wash your feet when you get home too? Am I becoming a germophobe? I’ve never felt inclined to do this until we moved here. The sidewalks and streets have a smattering of unmentionable and mysterious liquids, goops, feces, and litter. With so many birds everywhere bringing their essence(?) to our sidewalks… we’re much more strict about keeping our shoes off our floors and rugs than ever before.

4. To truly be alone and quiet in this city is really hard. When I used to visit the city, I loved listening to conversations on the subway. I wanted to hear what people in New York find important. But after a few weeks, I noticed I was going crazy listening to the thousands of conversations I was hearing every time I went somewhere. I understand why people have shoved audio books or music into their ears— it might be the only time they can zone out or tune out a conversation all day. The importance of finding alone time with not as much noise and maybe as few people as possible— it’s something I really love and value if I can have it. Finding quiet gardens, churches, parks, or spots on campus has been really important for my mental health. I’m grateful we live in an area that provides so many quiet spaces.

5. Sometimes you think it’s a bird or a squirrel under your bench, and then you see it’s actually a rat.

6. One of our new normals doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with the city. It has everything to do with our kitchen. For the most part, we’ve kept our kitchen rhythms. I have a desire to eat and cook healthy, but I don’t have a love for the kitchen or the grocery store. So we order our groceries online— thanks Whole Foods and Amazon Prime. When we moved we sold our rice cooker and our slow cooker and invested in an Instant Pot. That’s our new normal. An Instant Pot and all of it’s magical functions. It takes some time figuring it out. But so far, this is a new normal we LOVE.

Six is my favorite number, so I’ll stop there. We have an on-going list, so I’ll keep sharing. This is an awe-filled, broken, and buzzing city. We’re grateful to be here, but want to keep it real— it takes some getting used to once you’re actually living here. 

What is your favorite thing about transitioning to a new city? What is typically the hardest part for you? Share your answers in the comments!